Highlight Reel VS Reality

In an effort to build my business up a little more, I've been adding friends on Facebook & Instagram like crazy. I try to keep up with everyone and see where they're at... making new connections, becoming friends for real with more and more people... It's not a bad thing!
But it sometimes can be hard to remember that everyone is just posting their highlight reels. That their lives aren't as perfect as I perceive them to be. That it's okay for me to be struggling, even with my passions, even with the things I love to do.... Sometimes you just go through tough times, and there's really no explanation, no rhyme or reason as to why you feel like you keep "failing." I put that in quotations because I don't actually think I, or you, are failing during these times, except to maybe be "failing forward."
I have so much faith that this Beachbody business is going to be my family's salvation, our answer to not only a healthier life but to financial freedom. I have faith that this is going to save us from living paycheck to paycheck... from always being one missed payment from having something shut off, our car payment not going through... sometimes having to choose what food we can afford to eat that week.  I "fail forward" a lot though... I'm just working on finding my little spot in the business. I want to help EVERYONE but honestly,.. I don't always relate to everyone.
I am a mom. I am a young adult. I am a massage therapist. I believe in alternative medicine. I believe in eating healthily. I like to garden. I like to workout. I like to laugh.... a lot. I love wine. ;) I totally understand being strapped for cash. I get stress.
I understand grief. I understand deep grief, the kind that doesn't leave you.
But I also have HOPE. Hope in a better life, in an easier way of life. Hope in being able to have my cake and eat it too, if you will.
I want to not worry about bills, I want to always be present in my kids' lives, I want to be able to easily eat organically and not worry about cleaning the house.... I want to be a home owner. I want Drew to be able to stay home with us. I want to take my kids on vacations with just our family.... and not worry the entire time about having enough money to go in case something happens, like a car breaking down or  pipe busting (in our future house).
I have faith & hope that these things will come, as long as I keep working, as long as I am honest about this company, as long as I keep connecting and working and pushing... it may take time, but I believe it will happen.
BUT it is discouraging sometimes when I see others WHERE I WANT TO BE, it is easy to become FRUSTRATED with myself, to think that I SHOULD be there already, that I SHOULD be further ahead than where I am. It is easy to forget that they are posting about their wins, that I'm not seeing the "behind-the-scenes" frustrations and problems and the hard work that they have already put in. It's easy to remember that they were once where I am. And that my reality was once their reality. That I can get there too, if I trust and believe in myself and this company's potential.
I know I just need to keep at it.... and eventually, I'll be there, along with my current and future coaches who join me.
It's already changed my life so much for the better... the friendships, the fitness levels, the way my body has changed, the way I feel, the hope I have now that I never had before.... It can only keep getting better.
And one day, those highlight reels will be mine too, and they will be most of my reality.
I can't wait.

<iframe height="1251" allowTransparency="true" frameborder="0" scrolling="no" style="width:100%;border:none"  src="https://jaimeefreyermuth.wufoo.com/embed/zhl16w0c86s9p/"><a href="https://jaimeefreyermuth.wufoo.com/forms/zhl16w0c86s9p/">Fill out my Wufoo form!</a></iframe><div id="wuf-adv" style="font-family:inherit;font-size: small;color:#a7a7a7;text-align:center;display:block;"><span class="notranslate">Online contact and registration forms from <a href="http://www.wufoo.com">Wufoo</a>.</span></div>

Stressstressstress

I have been having  a really hard time getting in control of my stress for the past few weeks. Getting a puppy really is like having a small child... and on top of a high needs toddler and a baby... I have really been losing my shit.
I do love Koda... he is such a good dog. But he has definitely made life a lot more hectic and stressful than I anticipated... of course, it's not really his fault, he is just a puppy, but having to constantly be on top of Kieran to QUIT HITTING, STOP YELLING IN HIS FACE, DON'T TAKE HIS TOYS, STAY OUT OF THE CAGE, DON'T BUG HIM WHILE HE'S EATING, and (my favorite... not) QUIT RUNNING IN CIRCLES GETTING HIM WORKED UP UNTIL HE TRIES TO BITE.  Or taking my newly walking baby out of the kitchen over and over and over because he keeps trying to take a bath in the puppy's water bowl.... I feel like I am drowning in stress.
I know this won't last long. He is already learning our house rules and he is so good.
I'm trying to learn to breathe... I am trying so hard to quit screaming at my kids. But the more I try to stay calm, the more Kieran pushes and pushes and tests my limits, my boundaries, seeing what he can get away with... just FLAT OUT IGNORING ME or BEING OPENLY DEFIANT... and then I find myself screaming and doling out time outs and dragging him over to the step to sit over and over and over.
I lay awake at night, wanting to cry about how I yelled at my sweet little boy. My bright, curious, sunshine of a boy. My little man, who is just figuring this world out, who gets so lost in himself that sometimes, after the fact, I wonder if he really was being defiant, like I thought, or if he was just too wrapped up in his own thoughts and curiosity that I wasn't even penetrating the thin veil I sometimes think lays between us.  If maybe he wasn't ignoring an order, if maybe he didn't comprehend, if maybe the need to find out what would happen or how something works or to just complete the action that my words barely scratched the surface of his world.
Is he going to grow up to resent me? Am I dimming his light? Am I being too harsh? Am I expecting too much, am I not doing enough, does he need more help, do I need to back off? When I smacked his hand away from the outlet, did the sting last longer in his heart... how do I stress that some things are dangerous, that they will hurt him, possibly badly? How do I teach him to be a kind, gentle, respectful young man when I feel like all I do is scream and threaten and discipline? How do other moms stay so calm.. What am I doing wrong?
On Sunday morning, we have an appointment to fill out paperwork with a specialist. She is going to determine whether or not Kieran falls on the autism spectrum. I don't know what I think. I don't know what I feel. I am overwhelmed. I am crying a lot.
I've started to pray again.
I've been taking a lot of my anger and frustration out in my workouts. It's the only time I feel calm.. after I've laid it all out in my workout. I just wish the feeling would last.
The past few days his tantrums have been... unbelievable. I think he scared his speech therapist. I never know how best to calm him down. I feel so helpless. If I could take all of his heartache, his frustration, his fear, his ball of emotions that make him UPSET....I would.
But when he SHINES.... oh my word.
This boy steals my heart more everyday.
I am going to get through this rough patch. We are all going to get through this and when we do, it is going to be wonderful. I am going to sweat it out. I am going to learn to stay calm while he storms. I am going to swallow my fear and make him feel safe. I am going to go to sleep tonight knowing I did everything I could to help him.
And soon, this happy face will be happy MOST OF THE TIME again.

Flex Friday & Fighting Back

FLEX FRIDAY!

So I have been back at my 21 Day Fix Extreme! I am still struggling with the nutrition-- on top of it mostly BUT I have been falling off the wagon on and off and I have been feeling myself getting discouraged over and over and over. 

There's always that voice in the back of my head that doubts me, that brings me down, that tells me it's okay to SKIP a workout or INDULGE in that greasy pizza. 

Sometimes I listen to it. 

BUT MOST OF THE TIME I DON'T! And I am proud to say that I can see results from my MOST OF THE TIMES more than I see what I SOMETIMES do. I have NEVER had my arms look like this! I am always so focused on legs & abs that my arms are forgotten. I know that I am STRONG and to be able to SEE that strength in these pictures makes my heart happy....

Now, my abs may have gone a little to the wayside with some of my binges (I am going to be in control of those by the end of this year, I swear it! I am more focused & determined every day. Food will NOT control me ANYMORE. It will NOT!),  but I am going to be whipping those back to their former glory both in my workouts and in the kitchen this month. 

I know that this is going to be hard for me. I have never really been in complete control when it comes to food.... I either have gone overboard, barely surviving with what I ate and running off whatever I did eat... and then eventually CRASHING and BINGING on 4 bowls of ice cream, cereal, sandwiches, an entire pizza, an entire pack of cookie dough and then crying myself to sleep that night because I felt like a disgusting failure and gross human being. 

NO MORE. 

It has been a long time now since I have DEPRIVED myself of food (since finding out I was pregnant with my first son...). I swore I would never teach my kids those unhealthy habits.

So I make sure I eat good foods in front of them.

But bedtime, naptime, sneaking off in the kitchen alone time.... I feel like there is a monster living inside of me and I can't get enough, I eat until I am so full I can barely think. Oblivion. 

I will be stronger than that  monster soon, 

I am stronger everyday. 

And my babies won't ever meet this monster--- if I can't be stronger than him for me--- I can for them. 

He best be scared of those guns ^ ;) . <3 

Cause these two studs are making me stronger every single day. 

21 Day Fix Extreme... Trial and Error and Try Again

I have recently been attempting the 21 Day Fix Extreme.
I say 'attempting' because I haven't been sticking to the meal plan... at all. I haven't made it through one full day in the past 3 weeks, which is all the program is supposed to last in the first place!
I have been doing the workouts fine... they are comparable to Insanity Max:30, although I find Max:30 slightly more challenging, maybe because I need to up my weights for 21DFX? I'm not sure.

I have skipped a few days of working out here and there though.
I still have not been running, and I have been getting that itch to go again.
I can feel the weight sitting in my gut, dragging me down, making my soul feel heavy and my body ache.
I don't want to feel that way anymore, I want to feel light and energetic.
I want to have my float back.

So I am recommitting to this program.
I know that the meal plan and portion control is IMPORTANT if I want any actual results!
I am tired of falling off the wagon and I am tired of being complacent in my results (and not getting any results when I know I am working my muscles still!)

I am prepping my head this week, prepping my fridge, and sticking to it 100% for the entirety of this program.
I am ready to succeed!
If you want to join me, fill out the application below:
https://jaimeefreyermuth.wufoo.com/forms/m6krcnr03jze1f/

#beachbodycoach #21dayfixextreme #challengegroup #doitforYOU

When I was first learning about ways to eat clean, I was very overwhelmed.
I thought that I was going to be SO RESTRICTED and spend A TON OF MONEY!
I thought that there were TOO MANY RULES and that the food would get BORING!
I KNEW I needed to make a change for the sake of my health, but could I do it at the expense of my wallet and taste buds? No. I honestly wasn't willing to do that. But I wasn't willing to stay in my unhealthy eating rut, either.
So I read more and more and more.
I searched Pinterest for HOURS to find delicious CLEAN recipes.
I checked out TONS of grocery stores and online health food shops.
And here is what I found: It is TOTALLY possible to eat clean AND save money AND not sacrifice an inch of flavor!
Here is one of my FAVORITE clean eating recipes:
1 whole Chicken Breast, Cut into strips
2 TBS Honey
3 TBS Lemon Juice
3 TBS Tabasco Sauce
2 Bell Peppers, sliced
1 Onion, sliced
1 tsp Extra Virgin Olive Oil


Directions:
Mix Honey, Lemon Juice, and Tabasco Sauce and pour over chicken strips, let marinate. The longer, the better.
Sautee Bell Peppers and Onion in olive oil over medium heat until onions begin to turn translucent.
Add chicken and cook over medium-high heat  until cooked through.
Serve over a bed of Spinach and sliced Tomatoes, Berries, Hard-Boiled Eggs, and Cucumbers-- the Chicken and peppers are juicy enough that no dressing is required! :)

Working Out While Breastfeeding!

One of the biggest concerns I get when talking to new mothers about starting to work out again is that their milk supply might dry up! Now, I am not a lactation consultant** so I can only tell you the things I have learned and the experiences I have had as a fit mother of two extremely healthy little boys. 

First of all, I want to tell you that breastfeeding  does not mean that you can't work out. It doesn't even mean that you can't work out HARD. Both of my sons were 100% exclusively breastfed, but I am really going to talk about my experience with my younger son, because I didn't work out as hard when Kieran was a new baby, because I thought it would hurt my supply! 

Silas is 7 months old. In the past month, I have slowly been introducing a few solids, but not everyday, and he only eats probably 5-10 bites of whatever it is that I am feeding him. So he is still relying solely on breastmilk to keep him alive.

I began training for the Pittsburgh Marathon about 2 weeks after Silas was born. (Much sooner than they recommend, but I was restless and couldn't wait to get back to it. You should listen to your body and talk to your doctor after childbirth about beginning to exercise!) Then, when he was 4 months old, and I was frustrated with the tiny bits of progress I was seeing with both my body and also with my endurance during my runs, I ordered the program Insanity Max:30. 

If you have never done any of the Insanity programs, let me tell you, this was probably the hardest workout I had EVER done in my life. I had never worked that hard, sweated so much, or pushed so much in my life. 

I also cleaned up my diet by leaps and bounds. Instead of heavy carbs and junk food and cakes and ice cream, I began eating whole grains, veggies, lean meats, and fruit and the occasional bit of dark chocolate (okay, maybe more than occasional!). And I also started to drink Shakeology, so I was sure I was getting at least one dose of dense nutrition per day, so that I knew my baby was too.

Through ALL of this, I continued to breastfeed my beautiful baby boy. And I think that this picture speaks for itself, that he was getting PLENTY to eat ;) :

If I ever do notice a dip in my supply, I know that I just need to drink more water. Maybe eat a bigger meal at my next mealtime (every 2-3 hours for me!). But I stay very healthy by being fit and eating healthy meals and staying very hydrated. So my supply has never suffered, and there's a good chance that yours won't either, so long as you are drinking enough water and eating GOOD foods. 

But for now, I think that my 23 lbs 7 month old speaks volumes ;). 

I hope this helps!

#fitmom #healthymom #breastfeeding

Happy Memorial Day!

Although my family is DEFINITELY enjoying the extra day we all get together, I am so grateful to all of the soldiers who have given their all so that we can do so.
So happy to have the FREEDOM given to me so that I CAN pursue the career of my dreams, so that I am free to get after my goals, to be able to spend time focusing on my health, my fitness, and STILL be able to focus on my family-- all of my boys.
I cannot imagine what my life would be like without having the freedom granted to me by those who have served and made it that way for me.
I 100% enjoy this time to relax and have fun with my family, but I know that there are so many who are spending the day wishing they could spend the day with someone they have lost-- who gave their life so that I could keep my freedom and lifestyle.
I hope you all have had fun and also taken a second to reflect on the reasons why you may have gotten an extra day off, gone to a BBQ, or hit up a sale.
Maybe you got extra time for an intense workout- I know I did. (hopefully making up for some of that BBQ food!)
But at the end of the day, I hope you took a second to say thank you.
It is a beautiful thing to have the freedom we do, and I am so happy and grateful to say 'Thank you,' to all of those who have given that to me.

#MemorialDay #familyfun

Today, I am stuck in an attitude of gratitude! Not a bad place to be, eh?

I am still a BRAND NEW Beachbody Coach.
I am having small successes--- but, I AM HAVING SUCCESS! From the challenger telling me she has been inspired by me to workout and has lost 7.7 lbs., to the one who sent me the heartwarming message from the fitting room in Target where she was in tears of HAPPINESS over finally wearing a bikini for the first time in her LIFE, to the FIRST coach that I have signed under me telling me she is so excited about the way her jeans are fitting-- HECK, I wouldn't even call those SMALL successes, to ME, those are HUGE successes!!!!
And I am there, to hear about them, to encourage these amazing women to meet their fitness and health goals, and... I am so damn proud and so grateful to have been HANDED this opportunity to make a difference in someone's life. And to be so new and to have already made a difference in people's lives is just so unbelievable gratifying, so humbling, so amazing. I am truly blessed.
And although I KNOW there will be obstacles, there WILL be challenges for me in the months and years to come.. I am so in love with this business.
I am so happy.
Not only has it CHANGED MY LIFE... it is now CHANGING other people's lives too!
How can you NOT want to be a part of that?
How can you pass that up???
 I have gone from being so lonely, so meek and timid postpartum, so unsure, so lost.... to this new, better version of myself. Rediscovering who I was before life started to get me down.
Now...I am a happy person. I am finding myself. I am strong. I am unstoppable. I am purposeful.
I am so grateful.
And all of you, who have been watching me, supporting me, loving me....
I love you too. And thank you.

I just cannot seem to get it together these past two weeks!

I need a SERIOUS re-vamp on my diet.

I think I need to get running again!

And I am ordering the Whole 30 cookbook to begin in JUNE!

So get ready, y'all, for some badass recipes from your soon to be badass favorite #girlboss :)


As for now... I am going to QUIT with the CRAP for the rest of TODAY and chalk today up as a WIN, once I get my Brazillion Butt Lift workout in ;). AND when I do my elliptical workout once I get my kiddos to bed tonight.

I am a WARRIOR! :)

Work Hard. Eat Clean.

Spinach Salad.

1 C Spinach

4 Roma Tomatoes

1/4 C Sunflower Seeds

1/4 C feta

1/3 C blueberries

1 sliced Bell Pepper

*I added Grill Chicken/ 5 strips 

*2 TBS of your favorite healthy dressing. I like Organic Roasted Red Pepper

Simple, filling, delicious lunch! 

+ P90X3 CVX :) 

Work hard. Eat clean. Mom of 2, still have abs. 

This is why.

#fitmom #fitgirls #eatclean

Happy (late) Mother's Day!

Yesterday was Mother's Day. My third one since having Kieran, the first one since Silas has been born.

My kids are my world.
They are my reason to make good decisions.
The reason I changed my entire life.
The reason I get up early each morning and try to be focused, even when I would really love to lay my head back down and sleep.
The reason I lay awake late at night, wondering if I was there enough for them that day.
They are the reason I have permanent black circles beneath my eyes.... but they are also the reason that I have laugh lines already, at the age of 22.
They are the reason my hair is constantly in a huge knot at the top of my head, to prevent little hands from getting trapped in it.... but they are also the reason it has grown so long.

I have stayed up countless nights, soothing them, nursing them, rocking them, walking around, singing nonsense words to familiar tunes. I have changed more diapers, used more ointment, taken more temperatures, and dressed another person more times than I would have ever dreamed was possible... and my older child is not even 3 yet.
I have loved more than I ever thought was humanly possible. I have laughed harder and cried harder than I ever knew I could. I have been more frustrated than I have ever been in my life. I have yelled.... Oh, have I yelled.
I have never been more alive.



Motherhood is hard.
It is rough and demanding and scary and impossible.
It is amazing.

And all of the mothers I know- you are all amazing, too.
Keep up the good work!!

Vacation....

It's been almost one full week since I ran my first marathon.
The day after I ran.... I drove from Pittsburgh to The Outer Banks. 12 hours in the car, with two kids, two and under, and Drew's mother, Dale.
My left leg was begging to be chopped off.

But... I felt so good in that bikini. :)
Hard work pays off.

I indulged all week.
I haven't worked out since I ran on Sunday.
I ate a lot of junk.
I feel yucky.
I feel lazy.
I feel grimy.. on the inside.

I know that RIGHT NOW my body is reflecting my hard work.
BUT if I keep up this crap eating and lazy attitude, I know that very soon it will reflect that instead.
So, today, I am back to it.

I have made a promise to myself to set a good example for my babies to follow.
I have made a commitment to my health, and while every so often, it is okay to take a SHORT break, I know that it is time to recommit.
My body has recovered from the run I put it through.
It is time to start pushing myself once more.
When I feel like being lazy, like being unhealthy, I try to remember how I felt before I made a change.
I was so unhappy.
I was mean to myself.
I was impatient with my kids. (All the time.)
So.... time to get back to it. Because I want to keep on being a good example. I want to be healthy.
I like to have energy.
And I love seeing these happy faces, and knowing that I am teaching them how to live a healthy life.

Today, P90X3: The Warrior.
Because that's what I am. :)
#beachbody

#GameOnPgh

I did it, guys! I ran my first marathon!

The night before, I could barely sleep.
I was tossing and turning. My nerves were on edge.

I woke up at 5 AM and got dressed.
Forced myself to drink water and eat a piece of toast with some peanut butter.
Pinned and re-pinned my bib.
Made sure I had my runner's gels (which weren't too bad!).
Filled my water-bottle belt.
Tied my shoes.
Prayed my ankle/foot would hold up.
And woke up Drew to drop me off!

I didn't know anyone else running, so it was a lot of standing by myself.
I found a group with a pacer for running the full marathon on 4 hours and I decided to stick with them... for as long as I could. Which, to my surprise, was 17 miles, and then I lost them on a nasty hill or maybe at a fluid station.

I kept pushing. I almost gave up at 20 miles, when I could feel my injured foot pulsing and all of the self-doubt and self-loathing started to kick in.
"You didn't train hard enough."
"You should have worked harder."
"Who are you trying to kid?"
"I don't even really care about this." (<--such a lie!!)
"I can't do it."

I started to walk. I texted my mom. I told her my foot was busted and that I was walking.

She told me I was closer than I think. She told me it was okay to walk if I was hurt. She didn't offer ne an option to quit.
 I started to run again. Slowly. I stopped and walked a few more times.
Those last 6 miles were brutal.
I really thought I might never stop running.

And then, I stepped in a freaking pothole....  right next to the first beer station. (which, AWESOME, even though I did not partake for fear of throwing up.) I really thought I was in hell. But I wasn't.
I kept going.
At 26 miles, with .2 left to go, I saw my cousin Aimee, I heard her screaming my name.
Then I saw my mom out of the corner of my eye start running along the sidelines, screaming like a maniac.

I had seen my parents around mile 5, my Dad yelling and waving.
And then at about 10 or 12 miles, my cousins, the Conlins cheering me on .
And now, finally, the end, and there they were.
Each time, it lifted me up, made me pus harder, made me feel like I was a superhero.
My family was waiting at the finish line. :)

I sprinted (or what felt like sprinting) to the finish line.
And then I iced my ankle.
4:18:38  is my official time, from my start to finish. #GameOnPgh

I am so proud.

Remembering my "WHY"

Sometimes, going through the day, I get caught up in myself.
 I think, 'this is too hard. I just want a day off. I want to eat a lot of crap. I want to sit.'
 I think.... what is the point? 
And then..... I see these little faces. 

And I remember my 'why.'

 I want to lead by example. I want my boys to grow up fit and healthy. I don't want them plagued with childhood obesity, and to have to fight their entire lives just to be healthy. I want it to be second nature.
I also want to hopefully be around for most of their lives, which means taking care of me, by staying fit, by eating good foods, by drinking nutrient-dense shakes, by keeping at it, even when I don't want to. 

So..... even after a long night, getting up multiple times as Kieran goes through a little bit of sleep regression and Silas still wakes up a few times to nurse.... I get up, I keep going. I will fight the fight, walk the walk, everything. It's not always easy. It's not often easy. But they are worth it. And so am I. 
What's YOUR why?

‪#‎endthetrend‬ ‪#‎beachbody‬ ‪#‎family‬ ‪#‎findyourwhy‬

Working Out With Kids

I stay home with my kids 6 days a week.
Monday through Friday, Drew goes to work and I am on my own with them for 9 to 10 hours a day.

Don't get me wrong, I LOVE being home with my kids. Most of the time. But the hours are long. The days can get monotonous. The cleaning is never done, and usually by the end of the day it looks as if I have done absolutely nothing. (I wonder what it would look like if I really didn't...? ;) ) I am most definitely not one of those moms who has it all together. Most of the time, I'm barely hanging on by the skin of my teeth, counting the minutes until Drew gets home and I have another adult to talk to.

I rely way too much on Toy Story (1, 2, & 3) to get us through the day. We build blocks. We read. We sing songs and listen to music. I talk to people on Facebook a lot. I try to get Kieran to eat foods other than expensive fruit pouches and peanut butter sandwiches. (I fail.) We practice words. I change a lot of diapers. I try to keep up with laundry... which is not going so well the past two weeks, seeing as our washer is currently broken. I try to find the source of smells when they come up... usually successfully. We have play dates sometimes. And I try to keep us alive by buying and cooking our food.

A lot of time is spent nursing Silas, while trying to keep track of Kieran.
I used to yell a lot. (loudly)
I used time outs.... (more often than I would like)
I had mommy guilt. (can't help it, I'm Catholic.)

And in the middle of all of this, I started to work out. At least 30 minutes a day... usually more.

I'm not crazy.
                 ....................
......
.....


Okay. Well, that's not WHY I'm crazy.


Working out releases endorphins. With high endorphin levels, we feel less pain and fewer 
negative effects of stress.* (http://www.medicinenet.com/script/main/art.asp?articlekey=55001) 

Is that sinking in? WE FEEL FEWER NEGATIVE EFFECTS OF STRESS WHEN WE WORK OUT.
Also.. it doesn't say that you need to go to a gym to get this. I can work out at home. I can work out at home and not need a babysitter. I can work out at home and keep my stress levels from getting so high that I go completely bonkers (which is still a close call sometimes...).
And I don't waste naptime working out. (See? I really am not crazy ;) )
Kieran loves to "max out!" during Insanity with me. He loves to stretch during PiYo and P90X3. He loves to jump around. He loves to dance in Brazil Butt Lift. And he's learning to do more everyday. And also, he's learning that his mama is such a better, happier, more fun mama when she works out. (He's a pretty smart kid.)
And Silas LOVES to jump in his bounceroo while his big brother jumps around with me.

It wasn't easy to start.



At first, I tried to just work out once I got them both to sleep. But then... my time to pick up and make sure I had everything together and to just take a second to EAT by myself and not INHALE my food DISAPPEARED. I thought to myself, 'Why are you throwing this time away? Why can't the kids be awake for this? Why do you need to be alone?' And so the next day I tried it out. I worked out and let Kieran run around while I did.
And it was fine. He ran into the kitchen a lot. I paused it a lot to check on him. I was a little frustrated.




The next day... he joined in.
And the next, and the next, and the next....
Sometimes, he still runs off. But I yell out to him, and he yells back, and I have learned to let him explore a little bit as long as he checks in.
Sometimes, Silas cries and refuses to be put down for more than five seconds.
These days are hard.
Thankfully, I can workout when Drew gets home on these days, and they are rare.Or, I can do low-impact workouts and modify them in ways that I can hold Silas and still work! (Sometimes you gotta be creative.)

And I have come to realize that, not only am I benefiting myself by doing this, by becoming more fit and healthy every time I turn on my #beachbodyondemand and choosing a different workout, or putting in a disc, I am also benefiting my children. I am teaching them dedication. I am teaching them not to be stagnant. I am teaching them to be fit. And I am teaching them how to relieve stress. And even at the tender age of 2, Kieran has picked up on the fact that a good workout means a good day with me. He shows it by bringing me workouts, by trying to start the computer, by saying 'max out?' to me when I start to get short and huffy with him. I am ingraining good fitness habits into them, so that they will work out hopefully all their lives. It will just be natural to them.
And now..

I don't yell as much.
Time outs are fewer and more far between.
I have less guilt. (still Catholic, though.. ;) ).
Our home is happier, and the hours aren't as long.
#thanksbeachbody
<3

Success and Goals...

This picture makes me so proud. 

Two months ago, I was doing the 'skinny jean dance' to get these babies up. And then I was sucking it in to  try and get them buttoned. And wearing baggy tops to try to hide the muffin top. And avoiding sitting down in them, and hoping nobody noticed how the zipper was straining to bust open.

Two months ago, I thought I might never get here.

And then, I told myself to shut up. To suck it up and push.

I told myself that I was worth fighting for. I told myself that my body was worth fighting for. That my confidence was worth fighting for.

And now.... I can't dance in these jeans.... because they will FALL DOWN.

Now I've got a new goal:

And in two more months, I'll be posting about how proud I am when I've got wiggle room in these. 

#beachbody #workout #proud #workforit